Leisurely Saturday Morning Run

This morning I woke up and went for a run along the East River. Here is a list of some of the things I saw:

1. Several ducks swimming
2. Middle aged men fishing and displaying a great deal of Puerto Rican pride
   
3. Members of many Yorkville little league teams
   
4. Police recovering a dead body
5. Lots of floating trash

Drugs R Bad

Today I strayed from my usual route to school and ended up having an intriguing conversation with a gentleman addled by drug addiction and tooth decay. Below is a short excerpt from our long (and almost unintelligible) conversation"

Toothless Crack(meth?)head: Are you Spanish?
Me: (flattered to be mistaken for anything other than white) No.
TCH: Oh. You look Spanish. You look like my dad.
Me: What?
TCH: You look like my dad. He's Spanish. You know Andre the Giant?
Me: Yeah.
TCH: You look like him. You look like him. (trails off into a long monologue about the wrestling exploits of Andre the Giant)
Me: Oh. Interesting.
TCH: You know Elizabeth Taylor?
Me: (Hopeful that TCH will compare me to an attractive woman as opposed to a wrestler) Yes I know of her.
TCH: She was married to Macho Man Sanchez. You look like him. And you know what? You look like her, too (points to 14 year old Latina waiting at the bus). And like my dad. And like my mom. And like Andre. And Macho Man.
Me: Thank you.
TCH: You got a dollar?

The best commercial EVER

Ever since I moved to New York, I have had a song stuck in my head. That song, of course, is the reggaeton optimum cable ad. I have no idea how it happened, since I dislike reggaeton, but this ad has me hypnotized. Not only does the song stay with you, but the entire production -- from the pirates to the man dressed as a sea monster, is ridiculous. After discovering a large number of videos featuring people singing 877-393-4448 on Youtube, I know I'm not alone. So come on mi gente, watch this ad.





Here's another reggaeton ad, but this one is completely in Spanish.

That's Jive Turkey

I live in the most expensive city in the United States. I knew this before I moved here, but every now and then I will be blown away by the prices here. A few weeks ago I wandered into an Eli Zabar's market (the Vinegar Factory) looking for some deli meat. I wanted to buy 1 pound of turkey meat. Guess how much it cost:

• a) $12
• b) $22
• c) $9
• d) $18

If you guessed b ($22) you'd be right. That's right, for one pound of turkey meat, The Vinegar Factory expected me to pay $22. Say WHAT? Admittedly, any Eli's establishment is synonymous with overpriced, so even setting foot in the store was a bad choice on my part from the outset. Nonetheless, charging $22 for some regular honey smoked turkey is crazy. It wasn't organic, free-range, injected with diamonds, wrapped in gold leaf or anything like that. I guess this is what I get for living on the Upper East Side where a $70,000 income household is slumming it.

What are you doing New Year's Eve?

NYC is giving 2 days off for Rosh Hashannah this year! I don't know why we get off 2 days, but I choose not to question that which gives me a 4 day weekend. Happy New Year!! I plan to ring in the year 5768 by catching up on sleep and not yelling at children.