the hairs on my neck so that they stood straight on end. My mood plummeted and I descended into a despair so deep I felt as if I could never smile again. I feared that I was going crazy, then I saw this headline on yahoo: Cruise, Holmes Have Baby Girl Named Suri and realized it was only natural that I felt as if a part of my soul died -- TomKat's baby was born today.Yes, it's true: Tom Cruise's alien baby is born. She is healthy and her name is Suri, and she will either be the savior (if you're the sort who likes Dawson's Creek and dyslexics) or ruination (if you're the sort who fears and mocks scientology) of humanity. It is of the utmost importance now that we all focus positive energy on Michelle Williams' baby, Matilda, so that she may grow strong to some day counter the evil of the Tomkitten.
3 comments:
I have been so confused by all the rumors... some say she wasn't pregnant, other say it's an alien, and still another rumor asserts that it's chris klein's baby.
There's no proof that this baby was actually born, if you think about it.
Why does all of this remind me so much of Rosemary's Baby?
ok i have a crazy theory about tomkitten
christ klein left her when he found out that she was preggers...
then she had to stop taking her pills b/c it would affect the baby...
then crazy tom needed a gf...
she needed a man...
so yada yada yada...
she wears pregnancy pillows to disguise the fact that she had already had the baby
oops i meant chris
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