Brenda Frese: Great Coach, Mediocre Clapper

We are the champions, no time for losers cause we are the champions... of the world NCAA women's basketball! What a great game -- those of you out there who think that watching women's basketball isn't interesting then you missed a hell of a game between Duke and Maryland tonight. I'd admonish you for your close-mindedness and addiction to dunking, but I think that you (like UCLA) were punished enough by that lame-ass excuse for a game that was played last night. This game was exciting, you would have barely noticed the lack of penises. And thanks to Duke's strong tradition of talented, yet manly players, you probably would have forgotten their players even have breasts.

In case you missed it, let me fill you in with an approximation of what you missed:

Duke has some butch-y players and they lead for a lot of the game. This is a picture of a giantess who dominated the boards for much of the night (but I mean is that saying much? she's 6'7" all she has to do is put her hands up). She misses some free throws later, which I'd mock her for if I wasn't afraid she'd somehow find me and gnaw my bones.


During the second half, Maryland's cuter, younger players decide to show those bulls what's what. Crystal Langhorne, for one, says "I don't think so bitches, I'm not losing this game."


Despite the fact that a Duke player almost rips off her arm, Shay Doron continues her awesomicity.


Toliver is the s*** and forces an overtime. Did I mention she's only a freshman?


Maryland wins, Coleman rejoices.


Duke cries.


Maryland burns.



So here's to the Lady Terps -- the winningest basketball team (women OR men) in the history of Maryland. Sidenote: if you are an attractive young woman (with an open and a bi-curious mind) who had previously been going after the men's team -- I suggest you switch and start going after the women's team. First off, both teams are similar in that they both like to play basketball and have sex with women. Secondly, both teams are equally unlikely to make big bucks after college playing professional ball, but if you go after a woman player at least you'd be sleeping with a winner.